Funniest joke

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Funniest joke

Post  Major on Sat May 23, 2009 6:08 am

So let's see, who has the funniest joke?

Three guys get captured by a tribe in South America. The leader of the tribe goes up to them and says "Bring back tn of one type of fruit." A while later, one guy returns with ten coconuts. The leader then says "Put them up your but without changing your facial expression or we will kill you." The first guy gets to six but then winces and gets killed. The second guy comes back with berrys. The same intructions are givin to him and he gets to nine and then laughs. Up in heaven, the first guy asks the second guy "Why did you laugh?, you were so close." "Because" the second guy says "the third guy was coming back with pineapples."
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Pinkitypop on Sat May 23, 2009 6:16 am

Gahahaha!
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Zual Lynzo on Sat May 23, 2009 6:24 am

Omz, that was Hilarious!
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Major on Sat May 23, 2009 8:45 am

I got another one:

In this banque que there was this bored seven year old and his mum. Right infront of them was a quite obese women. The child says "My god she is fat." The women glares at the child and his mum tells him to be nice. The child streches his arms apart, "I bet her bottom is THIS big." he almost yells. The women glares at the child even more and the mum tells him off. Then, the womens pager starts beeping. The child screams "OH MY GOD, RUN FOR YOUR LIFE, SHE'S REVERSING!"

Is this one any good?
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Poison on Sat May 23, 2009 9:30 am

Major wrote:I got another one:

In this banque que there was this bored seven year old and his mum. Right infront of them was a quite obese women. The child says "My god she is fat." The women glares at the child and his mum tells him to be nice. The child streches his arms apart, "I bet her bottom is THIS big." he almost yells. The women glares at the child even more and the mum tells him off. Then, the womens pager starts beeping. The child screams "OH MY GOD, RUN FOR YOUR LIFE, SHE'S REVERSING!"

Is this one any good?

HAH.
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Major on Sat May 23, 2009 9:48 am

Right, well, this is quite an old one but it is still pretty funny.


Three guys who had just robbed a bank were walking down the streets pretty drunk. A police man stopped them. One guy whispered "We need to give false names." "Brilliant idea." the others said. The police man walks up to them and says "What are your names?" The first guy replys "My name is...." he looks around "Mr. Debenhams." The second guy replys "My name is...." he looks around "Mr. McDonnald." The third guy (who was extremmly drunk) looks around and says "My name is.....Mr. Kuntucky fried chicken!"
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Kentaro on Sat May 23, 2009 2:56 pm

LOL XD Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Chaniii on Thu May 28, 2009 2:03 pm

I still think this is funny...Very Happy

What did the apple say to the pear?

NOTHING,because it can't talk.
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Pinkitypop on Thu May 28, 2009 2:06 pm

Chaniii, you're very easily amused.

All my jokes are offensive Wink.
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Chaniii on Thu May 28, 2009 2:22 pm

Same...but I laugh alot..

Why does Piglet have no friends?
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Pinkitypop on Thu May 28, 2009 2:28 pm

I laugh too much, if you spent a day with me and recorded every sound I made, 3/4 of it would be laughing. Unless it's Thursday. I hate Thursdays.
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Chaniii on Thu May 28, 2009 2:30 pm

Same anyway..

Why does Piglet have no friends?
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Pinkitypop on Thu May 28, 2009 2:36 pm

Chaniii wrote:Same anyway..

Why does Piglet have no friends?


I don't know, why?
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Chaniii on Thu May 28, 2009 2:37 pm

Because he plays with POO/POOH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Pinkitypop on Thu May 28, 2009 2:38 pm

Chaniii wrote:Because he plays with POO/POOH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


O.o Ok Channay xD Very pleasent and ladylike Wink.
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Chaniii on Thu May 28, 2009 2:39 pm

Don't I know!
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Pinkitypop on Fri May 29, 2009 12:37 pm

More jokes? Very Happy
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Chaniii on Fri May 29, 2009 12:45 pm

Where do baby apes sleep?
Apricots.

What happens when a baby eats Rice Kristpies?
Its goes snap,crakle and poop.

What do you call a man with a paper bag on his head?
Russell

Why did the football manager give his team new lighters?
Because they kept losing all their matches

Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To see his flat mate
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Major on Fri May 29, 2009 1:05 pm

This is random but I still like it.

There are two muffins in a microwave. One says "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" The other one goes "OH MY GOD, A TALKING MUFFIN!"

This is quite funny.

Three guys are on top of the Empire State building. One guy goes "If you drink three beers, you can job off the building and will be able to fly around it twice without falling." The second guy goes "No you can't you stupid twit."
To prove his point, the first guy drinks three beers and jumps off and flys around and comes back. The second guy goes "Wow, I'm gonna try that." And so he does, which results in him falling to his death. The third guy goes "Bloody hell superman, stop being such a drunk git!"
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Chaniii on Fri May 29, 2009 1:23 pm

Why was the bird arrested?
Because he was a robin


Why did the golfer wear two pairs of trousers?
In case he got a hole in one.

]What do you call a train loaded with toffee?
chew chew train
What do you call two robbers?
A pair of knickers


Last edited by Chaniii on Fri May 29, 2009 1:26 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Pinkitypop on Fri May 29, 2009 1:25 pm

Major wrote:This is random but I still like it.

There are two muffins in a microwave. One says "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" The other one goes "OH MY GOD, A TALKING MUFFIN!"

This is quite funny.

Three guys are on top of the Empire State building. One guy goes "If you drink three beers, you can job off the building and will be able to fly around it twice without falling." The second guy goes "No you can't you stupid twit."
To prove his point, the first guy drinks three beers and jumps off and flys around and comes back. The second guy goes "Wow, I'm gonna try that." And so he does, which results in him falling to his death. The third guy goes "Bloody hell superman, stop being such a drunk git!"

I absoloutely fell over laughing at that xD!!.

I have one:

There were two normal people and a total idiot stranded on an island.

The first person swam away about ten miles, got tired and drowned.

The second swam away about thirteen miles, got tired and drowned.

The stupid person swam away about fifteen miles, got tired and swum back.
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Chaniii on Fri May 29, 2009 1:27 pm

xP
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Major on Fri May 29, 2009 2:00 pm

An Irish-man, a French-man and a Scots-man are stuck on a island. They find a magic lamp, they rub it a genie appears and grants them all one wish. "I wish to be home with my family." says the Scots-man. "Me too." says the French-man. The Irish-man goes, "I'm kinda lonely, could I get my friends back?"
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Re: Funniest joke

Post  Chaniii on Fri May 29, 2009 2:09 pm

lol! I think I've got a good joke..
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